Droppin’ A Cruz

I really want this to catch on.

No reason it can’t.  Outside of the fact that I’m really not anybody.  I lack the power to have things get popular.  That’s a skill and I’m not sure how to attain it.

But if there were ever something that should catch on, it’s this.

We got a puppy.  Here he is.  So fucking cute.

robbie01Pictures don’t really do him justice.

But I can tell you he is damn cute.

We brought him home five or so weeks ago.  Maybe almost six.  I lose track.  The first thing this little guy does is drop an eyedropper of urine onto the carpet.

A little later he pushes a movement out.  I said, “Oh man, he just dropped a Cruz.”

Like that.  I announced that day that the stool my little puppy pushed out are basically just a Cruz.

Because Ted Cruz is a piece of shit.

I wake in the morning and get some caffeine.  Maybe I make some breakfast.  Then I announce I have to go drop a Cruz.

Don’t worry.  This would never offend Ted Cruz.  He’s just looking for a little attention.  Any meme is good for him.  It means that somebody thought about that little fucking piece of shit.

I’ll step back.  I do think Ted Cruz is awful.  All of his rhetoric.  The way he hates with love.  That tone he takes.  That five second pause before pushing out just a little more excrement.  Don’t tell me you didn’t notice.  That pause.  The ridiculous fucking pause.

Go back to The Cat in the Hat you obstructionist ass hole.

Why I call it “droppin’ a Cruz.”  Let’s face it.  He’s not likable.  He actually probably stinks.  His ideas are pure horseshit.

Cruz thinks it’s okay to deport immigrants even though his father was a fucking immigrant.

He thinks that separation of church and state is not real.  Like his god I’m guessing.

This fucker is a turd quesadilla wrapped in bacon.

Bacon doesn’t actually make everything better.

You’ll figure it out.

My dog feels as if droppin’ a Cruz is so outside the mainstream now, that he has to run off into the corner where nobody can see him to do it.  Makes me sad.

Here’s the point.

Next time you need to have a bowel movement, let’s get this trend started.  Tell the world you just dropped a Cruz.  If we get enough momentum, the world will know what you mean.

If you are at work and you need to go use the restroom, tell those around you, “I’ll be right back.  Gotta drop a Cruz.”

If a part of the house stinks, just tell the people around, “Sorry, had to drop a Cruz.”

This will all make sense, and is certainly easier than saying deuce.  What the hell is that?

Well, until Cruz drops off into obscurity.

Let’s face it, he’s so unpopular that he’s losing to a fascist ass hole.  Do you realize how much of a bad person you have to be to be losing to a fascist?

You have to smell of the worst shit possible.

Here’s my meme for it.


Please, love my dog.


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